January 17, 2010

The Limp Stalker Strikes Again

According to official police sources, the killer known as The Limp Stalker has added another man's life to the death toll bringing the total number up to twelve over the past seventeen months. The body was found in a Wal Mart Supercenter family restroom yesterday evening but as of now, the identity of the victim has yet to be released.

All twelve victims have been men over the age of 65. None have been in the best physical condition which has made them easy targets for the killer. It took investigators several months to actually figure out that the men had been murdered and to piece together what was actually occurring in the moments leading up to their deaths. So far officers have figured out that the killer lures the men into the family restrooms at local shopping centers, offers and gives oral sex causing the men to go into cardiac arrest, then steals their wallets, and leaves them to die.

The first victim, Gus Parker, age 74, was found in a Publix restroom just off North Boulevard. His pants were pulled to his knees and he was still sitting erect in his wheelchair. Authorities said there were no signs of a struggle nor did the man have any bruises or cuts. As far as investigators could tell, he seemed to be at peace. Beyond the missing wallet, nothing seemed strange about the events which has been true in each case. This, according to the department, is what made it so difficult to link the cases and determine that these were actually murders until similarities were established between the first five victims. Each of the victims has been found in family restrooms in just this manner over the last year and a half with no signs of distress and each in poor physical condition at the time of their deaths. The killer preys on the vulnerable population and seems to be untraceable so far. No leads have been established at this time nor has any physical evidence been left at the scene. Each man's penis had been wiped clean when police found them. No traces of saliva thus no dna has been left behind at all.

Investigators have asked the citizens of this area to please be aware and on the lookout for any suspicious characters accompanying older men to public restrooms and report it as soon as possible. A hotline has been set up for any information, witnesses, clues, etc. 1-800-OLDDICK

1 Comments:

Bag Man said...

Haha...that is so twisted its funny!

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about me. not really.

dear you,

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instead, let's abandon the tethers of domestication for a moment and remember what it's like to laugh at vulgarity and the world at large.

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