February 6, 2010
Don't forget to breathe today!
6:03 PM | Posted by
Dan T. Man
I work at a book store in a pretty small town. I've been working there for about a year and a half and I've been greeted thousands of times by all sorts of different people in many different ways. I've also heard thousands of different farewells. For example, it rains a lot here, so I might say something like "stay dry out there" as the customer is leaving the check out counter. Or, "drive safe" to tourists, etc. They may, sometimes say something similar in return. But recently I heard what I think is the most bizarre "so long" ever. This guy was only middle aged (late 30s maybe early 40s). He looked pretty damn normal. Everything was just fine until he said what he said to me. I rang up his books, put them in the bag, gave his change and said "Have a great day."
He said, "Thank you, you too. Stay out of jail."
"I'm sorry?" I say back to him.
"Stay out of jail." He says again.
"Oh", I say.
I honestly did not know what to say...let alone what to think. What on Earth does something like that mean, exactly? I mean, don't get me wrong here, "Stay out of jail" is great advice. Common sense, really. Like, "Hey, don't murder anybody today!" or "Have a good day, oh, and don't go running anyone over with your car." And I definately plan on doing just that...staying out of jail. But what gets me is this: Why did he say it? Why did he say it to me? Do I look like someone who's been to jail before? Do I look like someone who belongs in jail? What is it that made me look like I needed to know this piece advice?
I really felt offended. I couldn't believe that someone would just assume that someone else has been to jail before, assume that someone look as thought they should be put in jail...what a judgemental sommammabitch!
Nevermind...
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2 Comments:
at least it wasn't 'Stay out of minors' now that would indicate pointed commentary. I think he probably meant to say 'hey thanks man, and if the cops come around just run like hell cuz they're looking to pin it on one of you booksellingliteratepeople for sure!!! (potentially adding zoinks!!!) before clicking his heels and bolting.
i dunno. tres weird.
this made me giggle ridiculously hard when i saw it sunday morning. i was logged in on my phone though and couldn't comment. i've giggled everytime i've thought about how much i needed to comment. fucking funny.
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